You are not your thoughts.
Thoughts are your tools.
You are not your emotions.
Emotions are your guidance.
You are creating your reality with your thoughts. Your emotions are the map.
Emotions (sensations) are the first signal letting us know that our thoughts are off base.
Just like a bad smell or a bad taste is a reliable signal letting you know that something isn't right, your emotions predictably let you know when your thinking is off.
Now, this isn't magical and automatic. Oh, it's so easy, what's wrong with you? NO. That's not it at all. It's simple, but it's often been buried beneath years and years of forgetting who we are.
Some ways to start remembering:
1. Meditate: Get quiet every single day for 15 minutes. In so doing, you will find (with practice) that you can actually observe your thoughts as they pass by. You can unhook yourself from the thought stream and watch it, instead of being carried away by them. As the thoughts begin to float away you will experience stillness, quiet, even just for a few seconds at a time. Slowly, as you let go of thoughts you'll be creating space for new, different thoughts to arrive. It's like getting ready for a visitor, we clear out a space for them. You want new thoughts, you have to make some space! Focus on something like your breathe or a mantra. Follow a guided meditation online (there are hundreds) My fave app is insight timer! Take time to quiet your mind. Only then can you get the kind of inspired thoughts that come from Wisdom.
2. Listen to that still small voice: There is a voice that does not use words, Listen! (Rumi)
Your body is guiding you with emotions. If something feels bad, even a little bit, that means it's time to stop and reevaluate. That tingle in your chest when you get impulsive? That pounding in your heart when you think back to a certain memory? That guitar string twinge through your core when you imagine that future scenario? That is your emotional guidance telling you: nope, turn around and go the other way, this is not going to get you where you want to go. You can trust this. You can also be sure that it's the first signal that your thoughts are negative and also false.
3. Practice self inquiry. About 2 years ago I started practicing the art of questioning my thoughts. Every distressful thought that came my way, I was able to begin transforming. The idea here is that all people and situations are a mirror to us. Our judgments are the point of transformation. This practice involves two worksheets, the first one for your judgements and then the second for turning the thoughts around. The judgement page helps us get to the heart of what is most distressful. The turnarounds help even the most sticky thoughts let go! (again, making space for better, higher thoughts). Want to get started? I've got my own version of these powerful tools and would love to email them to you for free!
4. Seek support: Once you start questioning your thoughts you may find some are reluctant to let go. If that is the case, it's likely because you've been holding that thought so long that it's become a belief. And it could be that a very young child part of yourself holds that belief as a way of protecting you. If that is the case and you find you can't progress into clearer thinking, you might benefit from my counseling support.
If you want to get greater ease of access to your thoughts and find the doors are closed, it could be because you have a lot of old trauma blocking the way. Let me help you clear a space for new life within yourself!
Email me to get started: firstname.lastname@example.org